Never Mind the Quality, Feel the Width is a British television sitcom first broadcast in 1967 as a single play in the Armchair Theatre anthology series, later becoming a series of half-hour episodes, which ran until 1971. A total of 40 episodes were made; all but one of them are believed to have aired.
The plots revolves around two tailors in business together. Manny Cohen, played by John Bluthal, is Jewish, and Patrick Kelly, played by Joe Lynch, is Irish Catholic. Above their shop works Lewtas (Bernard Spear) who is also Jewish and imports cloth. Two further prominent characters are Rabbi Levy (Christopher Benjamin in the pilot – he reappeared in a later episode as Dr Shapiro – Cyril Shaps in series 1 to 4, David Nettheim and Jonathan Burn as Rabbi Stone in series 5) from the local synagogue, and Father Ryan (Denis Carey in the pilot, Eamon Kelly in series 1 to 4) from the local Catholic church. The Romanian-born Meier Tzelniker also makes several appearances as Israel Bloom.
One episode features Manny and Patrick trading the rights to display their pictures around the shop. Patrick has two pictures of the Pope on the wall, while Manny has one of Moshe Dayan. Manny's comment is "It's the going rate. Two Popes to one Moshe."
Another episode, "The Not So Kosher Cantor", has Patrick, a talented singer, filling in at the synagogue for a sick cantor, on the occasion of a visit by the Chief Rabbi. Coached to sing phonetically in Hebrew, Patrick performs, every moment milked for comedic value. Finally, the Chief Rabbi congratulates Patrick but reveals he knows something is up. When asked how he knows, he replies that at the end of the service, "you genuflected and made the sign of the cross!"
In 1973, Bluthal and Lynch reprised their roles in a film spin-off.
Episodes
The pilot and the first two series were produced by ABC; however, the second series (of six episodes) did not air until just after Thames Television, which initially aired the six series 2 episodes over August and September 1968, launched. Of the 40 episodes made, 11 are believed to no longer exist. These are the pilot, five of the six episodes from Series 1, and five of the six episodes from Series 2.
Episodes marked with an * are, according to Kaleidoscope Publishing, currently missing from the archives.
Pilot (1967)
"Never Mind The Quality, Feel The Width" (18 February 1967)*
Series One (1967)
1.1. "Cohen & Kelly" (25 November 1967)*
1.2. "Not So Much A Sanctuary, More A Penance" (2 December 1967)*
1.3. "Remember That Thou Keep Holy" (9 December 1967)*
1.4. "Man Shall Not Live By Bread Alone" (16 December 1967)
1.5. "Leopards Can Change Their Spots" (23 December 1967)*
1.6. "A Flower Of Israel" (30 December 1967)*
Series Two (1968)
2.1. "And A Yamulka To Match" (13 August 1968)*
2.2. "A Madonna for Manny" (20 August 1968)*
2.3. "And Leave The Rest Of The World Behind" (3 September 1968)*
2.4. "A Suit Fit For A Prince" (10 September 1968)*
2.5. "Hello Mother, Hello Father" (17 September 1968)
2.6. "All That Glitters Is Not Gelt" (24 September 1968)
Christmas Special (1968)
"I'm Dreaming Of A Kosher Christmas" (26 December 1968)
Series Three (1969)
3.1. "Old Soldiers Never Die" (21 August 1969)
3.2. "Situations Vacant – Apply Saville Row" (28 August 1969)
3.3. "David Kossoff? He's A Friend Of Mine" (4 September 1969)
3.4. "Arrividerci Roma" (11 September 1969)
3.5. "It's The Thought That Counts" (18 September 1969)
3.6. "And A Brother A Priest" (25 September 1969)
Christmas Special (1969)
"All Star Comedy Carnival" (mini episode) (25 December 1969)*
Series Four (1970)
4.1. "Blood Is Thinner Than Water" (25 June 1970)
4.2. "Without Prejudice" (2 July 1970)
4.3. "New Worlds For Old" (9 July 1970)
4.4. "What You've Never Had, You Never Miss" (16 July 1970)
4.5. "Miracles To Measure" (23 July 1970)
4.6. "Only Four Can Play" (30 July 1970)
Series Five (1970–71)
5.1. "And Ecumenicals To You" (15 December 1970)
5.2. "I'll Take You Home Again, Kathleen" (22 December 1970)
5.3. "Twenty Years On" (29 December 1970)
5.4. "A Question Of Policy" (5 January 1971)
5.5. "The Not So Kosher Cantor" (12 January 1971)
5.6. "And Nobody Knew They Were There" (19 January 1971)
5.7. "You Will Go To The Ball, Manny Cohen" (26 January 1971)
Series Six (1971)
6.1. "Manny Cohen R.I.P." (3 August 1971)
6.2. "Romeo Cohen And Juliet Weinberg" (10 August 1971)
6.3. "Holiday With Kosher Strings" (17 August 1971)
6.4. "There's No Smoke Without Fire" (24 August 1971)
6.5. "Weavers To Wearers" (31 August 1971)
6.6. "Daylight Robbery" (7 September 1971)
6.7. "Mix Me A Marriage" (14 September 1971)
DVD release
A 4-disc set of the show, containing the Thames TV series, was released on DVD in June 2010, by Network.
Never Mind the Quality, Feel the Width at the British TV Online Resources
January 06, 2023
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Never Mind the Quality Feel the Width is a British television sitcom first broadcast in 1967 as a single play in the Armchair Theatre anthology series later becoming a series of half hour episodes which ran until 1971 A total of 40 episodes were made all but one of them are believed to have aired Never Mind the Quality Feel the WidthGenreSitcomCreated byVince PowellHarry DriverStarringJohn BluthalJoe LynchBernard SpearCyril ShapsEamon KellyCountry of originUKNo of series6 pilot No of episodes41 including mini Christmas special ProductionProducersLeonard WhiteRonnie BaxterStuart AllenAlan TarrantRunning time30 minutesProduction companiesABC Weekend TV pilot series 1 2 Thames Television series 3 6 ReleaseOriginal networkITVOriginal release18 February 1967 1967 02 18 14 September 1971 1971 09 14 It was originally made by ABC Weekend TV for the ITV network with its production being continued by Thames Television Contents 1 Plot 2 Film adaptation 3 Episodes 3 1 Pilot 1967 3 2 Series One 1967 3 3 Series Two 1968 3 4 Christmas Special 1968 3 5 Series Three 1969 3 6 Christmas Special 1969 3 7 Series Four 1970 3 8 Series Five 1970 71 3 9 Series Six 1971 4 DVD release 5 See also 6 References 7 External linksPlot EditThe plots revolves around two tailors in business together Manny Cohen played by John Bluthal is Jewish and Patrick Kelly played by Joe Lynch is Irish Catholic Above their shop works Lewtas Bernard Spear who is also Jewish and imports cloth Two further prominent characters are Rabbi Levy Christopher Benjamin in the pilot he reappeared in a later episode as Dr Shapiro Cyril Shaps in series 1 to 4 David Nettheim and Jonathan Burn as Rabbi Stone in series 5 from the local synagogue and Father Ryan Denis Carey in the pilot Eamon Kelly in series 1 to 4 from the local Catholic church The Romanian born Meier Tzelniker also makes several appearances as Israel Bloom One episode features Manny and Patrick trading the rights to display their pictures around the shop Patrick has two pictures of the Pope on the wall while Manny has one of Moshe Dayan Manny s comment is It s the going rate Two Popes to one Moshe Another episode The Not So Kosher Cantor has Patrick a talented singer filling in at the synagogue for a sick cantor on the occasion of a visit by the Chief Rabbi Coached to sing phonetically in Hebrew Patrick performs every moment milked for comedic value Finally the Chief Rabbi congratulates Patrick but reveals he knows something is up When asked how he knows he replies that at the end of the service you genuflected and made the sign of the cross Notable guest artistes include film actors Dennis Price as a Savile Row tailor and Rupert Davies as a Roman Catholic bishop Fred Emney Harold Bennett David Kossoff playing himself Jack Smethurst Dad s Army stars Frank Williams playing another clergyman and Bill Pertwee comedian Dick Bentley Roy Marsden Victor Maddern future Coronation Street stars Barbara Knox credited as Barbara Mullaney and Roy Barraclough George A Cooper Rita Webb Michael Robbins and Ellen Pollock as Manny s mother Ruby Film adaptation EditMain article Never Mind the Quality Feel the Width film In 1973 Bluthal and Lynch reprised their roles in a film spin off Episodes EditThe pilot and the first two series were produced by ABC however the second series of six episodes did not air until just after Thames Television which initially aired the six series 2 episodes over August and September 1968 launched Of the 40 episodes made 11 are believed to no longer exist These are the pilot five of the six episodes from Series 1 and five of the six episodes from Series 2 Episodes marked with an are according to Kaleidoscope Publishing currently missing from the archives Pilot 1967 Edit Never Mind The Quality Feel The Width 18 February 1967 Series One 1967 Edit 1 1 Cohen amp Kelly 25 November 1967 1 2 Not So Much A Sanctuary More A Penance 2 December 1967 1 3 Remember That Thou Keep Holy 9 December 1967 1 4 Man Shall Not Live By Bread Alone 16 December 1967 1 5 Leopards Can Change Their Spots 23 December 1967 1 6 A Flower Of Israel 30 December 1967 Series Two 1968 Edit 2 1 And A Yamulka To Match 13 August 1968 2 2 A Madonna for Manny 20 August 1968 2 3 And Leave The Rest Of The World Behind 3 September 1968 2 4 A Suit Fit For A Prince 10 September 1968 2 5 Hello Mother Hello Father 17 September 1968 2 6 All That Glitters Is Not Gelt 24 September 1968 Christmas Special 1968 Edit I m Dreaming Of A Kosher Christmas 26 December 1968 Series Three 1969 Edit 3 1 Old Soldiers Never Die 21 August 1969 3 2 Situations Vacant Apply Saville Row 28 August 1969 3 3 David Kossoff He s A Friend Of Mine 4 September 1969 3 4 Arrividerci Roma 11 September 1969 3 5 It s The Thought That Counts 18 September 1969 3 6 And A Brother A Priest 25 September 1969 Christmas Special 1969 Edit All Star Comedy Carnival mini episode 25 December 1969 Series Four 1970 Edit 4 1 Blood Is Thinner Than Water 25 June 1970 4 2 Without Prejudice 2 July 1970 4 3 New Worlds For Old 9 July 1970 4 4 What You ve Never Had You Never Miss 16 July 1970 4 5 Miracles To Measure 23 July 1970 4 6 Only Four Can Play 30 July 1970 Series Five 1970 71 Edit 5 1 And Ecumenicals To You 15 December 1970 5 2 I ll Take You Home Again Kathleen 22 December 1970 5 3 Twenty Years On 29 December 1970 5 4 A Question Of Policy 5 January 1971 5 5 The Not So Kosher Cantor 12 January 1971 5 6 And Nobody Knew They Were There 19 January 1971 5 7 You Will Go To The Ball Manny Cohen 26 January 1971 Series Six 1971 Edit 6 1 Manny Cohen R I P 3 August 1971 6 2 Romeo Cohen And Juliet Weinberg 10 August 1971 6 3 Holiday With Kosher Strings 17 August 1971 6 4 There s No Smoke Without Fire 24 August 1971 6 5 Weavers To Wearers 31 August 1971 6 6 Daylight Robbery 7 September 1971 6 7 Mix Me A Marriage 14 September 1971 DVD release EditA 4 disc set of the show containing the Thames TV series was released on DVD in June 2010 by Network See also EditList of films based on British sitcoms The Rag TradeReferences EditMark Lewisohn BBC Online Comedy Guide Radio Times Guide to TV Comedy British TV Online ResourcesExternal links EditNever Mind the Quality Feel the Width at British Comedy Guide Never Mind the Quality Feel the Width at IMDb Never Mind the Quality Feel the Width at the British TV Online Resources Retrieved from https en wikipedia org w index php title Never Mind the Quality Feel the Width amp oldid 1114548742, wikipedia, wiki, book, books, library,
